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This week’s contenders: Wedding Owl vs. Wedding Snake, Bridesmen vs. Groomsmaids, iTunes vs. DJ, First Dance vs. Last Dance.

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This week’s contenders: Crosswords vs. Sudoku, Flim-flams vs. Doo-dads, Slam vs. Jam, Bill Nye vs. Mr. Rogers.

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This week’s contenders: Rich & Ugly vs. Poor & Handsome, Wet Socks vs. Never Shampooing, Clichés vs. Lyrics from Disney songs, Giant hornets vs. Great white.

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This week’s contenders: Telling all truths vs. All lies, Minstrel vs. Butler, Being a man-child vs. Unrecognizable, Circus vs. Carnival.

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This week’s contenders: Nowhere man in a nowhere land vs. Barbie girl in a Barbie world, Bad Robots vs. Mutant Enemies, Longboard Barkley vs. Bucket Shaq, Teens vs. Corrupt politicians, Barack vs. The Rock.

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This week’s contenders: Beer vs. Poetry, Always pooping when you pee vs. Throwing up instead of going to the bathroom, Dolores Umbridge from Harry Potter vs. Terence Fletcher from Whiplash, Being Kardashian famous vs. Being the head of your own cult.

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This week’s contenders: Seth Rogen vs. Josh Groban, Dodge Ball vs. Dodge Viper, Batmen vs. Celebrity confusion, Easter Bunny vs. Krampus.

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This week’s contenders: Robocop vs. Rollercop, Agent Dale Cooper vs. Dale the Chipmunk, Baseball mitts for hands vs. Flippers for feet, Booing Mailpeople vs. Slow clapping at meetings.

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This week’s contenders: Living wifi hotspot vs. Vomiting big macs, Bad ballet dancer vs. Bad Orchestra member, Butter for fingers vs. Butterfingers for fingers, Jaden Smith vs. Kim Jong Un.

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This week’s contenders: Tribbles vs. Gremlins, No one getting your references vs. Not getting any references, Scotch tape vs. Scotch whisky, Nicolas Cage Superman or Nic Cage Batman.

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This week’s contenders: Cupid vs. Hawkeye, Receiving chocolates vs. Receiving lingerie, Braggy Couples vs. Bitter singles, Never giving you up vs. Never letting you down.

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This week’s contenders: Guy Fieri’s Hair vs. Goatee, Dancing like nobody’s watching vs. Loving like you’ve never been hurt, Top Chef vs. Hell’s Kitchen, Long lines vs. Unpopped Ears.

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This week’s contenders: Anthropomorphized Animals vs. Items, Weak Toilet Paper vs. Chewing Chalk, Frasier vs. Family Matters, Glittered Sweat vs. Follow That Car.

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This week’s contenders: Rita Skeeter vs. Skeeter Valentine, All spoiled movies vs. No recommended movies, Milkshake vs. Cappuccino, Commander Shepard vs. Captain Kirk.

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This week’s contenders: LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT’S Hologram Moon vs. Lizard Overlords, Pirate vs. Lost Boy, Ride vs. Drive, Training Luke vs. Anakin.

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This week’s contenders: Full House Xmas vs. Home Improvement Xmas, Rooty-toot-toots vs. Rummy-tum-tums, Tinsel vs. Wrapping Paper, TV specials vs. Xmas movies, A Xmas Carol vs. A Xmas Story, Hermie the Elf vs. Bernard the Elf.

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This week’s contenders: Mannheim Steamroller vs. Trans-Siberian Orchestra, Krampus vs Santa, Eidetic memory vs. Limited precognition, No presents but family vs. Presents but alone.

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This week’s contenders: Chewbacca vs. Chewing tobacco, Joker vs. Jackass, Isolation vs. Eternal repetition, Ruby slippers vs. Rubeus Hagrid.

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This week’s contenders: Turkey vs. Ham, Connected movement vs. Connected speech, Half your height vs. Twice your weight, Garfield vs. Dilbert.

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This week’s contenders: AN IMPORTANT UPDATE, Tramp stamp vs. Belly button piercing, New car smell vs. Euphoric fire smell, No bad drivers vs. No lines, Sharingan eyes vs. Cyclops eyes.

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